Addiction & Dependence

Even with younger children, you should set a time limit for consuming digital games. This framework can be gradually adjusted according to the child's age or stage of development. With older children, play times can also be discussed. Ultimately, children should learn to take responsibility for their lives and regulate their media use themselves.

A media usage agreement for the family or playtime accounts that your children can use have also proven successful in many cases.

Once agreements have been made, they should be binding on both sides. The consequences of non-compliance with agreements should also be negotiated and recorded together. In this way, compromises reached can become a guideline for dealing with media in the family, to which all family members adhere. Do not shy away from conflicts. Parents have the right to limit media consumption in a sensible way, even if this results in disputes. This gives adolescents a sense of security. Give reasons for prohibitions so that your child feels taken seriously and understands why you are setting limits.

Even if all other parents allow play, that doesn't mean you have to do the same. Listen to your gut and judge your child's competencies wisely. Can he or she responsibly handle the temptations without compromising other obligations? And what support does your son or daughter need from you?

To keep an eye on your children's playtimes, additional technical protection measures can be used, which are already available in some games, operating systems and game consoles. Depending on the operating system, appropriate settings can also be made or suitable apps installed for smartphones and tablets. However, such programs are not an all-round carefree package and still require accompaniment.

Take this opportunity to reflect on your own media behavior. You can be a role model for your child by the way you handle smartphone, TV and other media yourself. Encourage a conscious discussion of media consumption in the family: Keep a media diary together, in which times, screen activities, experiences or even feelings about gaming are noted.

Digital games are a part of children's and young people's lives, and they should have their place as a hobby. However, you should also ensure that your children pursue a wide range of leisure activities so that digital games and the Internet do not take on too much importance. Offer stimulation and alternatives to digital games to promote self-efficacy experiences in everyday life, e.g. in the form of joint activities or hobbies such as sports, music and meeting friends. However, these alternatives must be interesting and enjoyable for your child.

Not every night played through is cause for concern. Pay attention to whether gaming leads to changes, e.g., in school performance, contact with friends, leisure activities, or sleeping and eating habits. If you find signs of this, it is important not to "demonize" digital games in a joint conversation. Many affected young people don't realize that their behavior is problematic and can't see the consequences. Make your child aware of your perception during the conversation and talk about the media offerings without reproaches and with a well-founded attitude. This is the only way to reach your child. And don't shy away from conflict with your child. Sometimes parents also have to clearly point out boundaries.

Look for the reasons for excessive consumption. What is your child missing in everyday life? What unmet wants and needs does he or she have? Where do worries and problems lie? Is there a lack of support and recognition and how can you specifically change this? Encourage and create recreational and employment opportunities in the family. Encourage the resumption of previously pursued hobbies. Activities that provide group experiences, such as team sports or educational programs in a youth center, are a useful counterbalance to virtual experiences.

If you have the impression that your child's game use is a cause for concern, you can use various tests or behavioral observations as a basis. However, these are only meant as suggestions to think about your child's usage behavior. Also use these materials to engage in conversation with your child. A joint, understanding discussion about media use is a first and important step.

If you conclude that your child is at high risk or already addicted, be sure to seek further information and professional help. Get support to get your child out of media addiction. Points of contact are, for example, addiction and family counseling, clinics or psychologists. Read the reports and experiences of other parents or those affected on Internet forums. This will help you understand and show you that you are not alone in this difficult situation.