Cyberbullying: recognizing warning signs and reacting correctly

Whether in the family, at school or at work - conflicts and arguments are normal and part of life. However, it becomes problematic when there is a permanent imbalance - when someone is constantly teased, oppressed or ostracized. Then we talk about bullying.

We talk about cyberbullying when bullying takes place in digital media. This can happen via social networks such as Instagram, TikTok and Snapchat or messenger services such as WhatsApp, on websites, in forums or even in gaming chats and their communities.

On this page, parents will find helpful information on how they can protect their child from cyberbullying. You can also find out what steps you should take if (cyber)bullying has already occurred.

Teachers are also increasingly confronted with cases of bullying in their day-to-day work and must react appropriately and sensitively. On our subpage Approach to the prevention and intervention of cyberbullying educational professionals can find all the information they need about cyberbullying in schools.

Whether at school, in the family or at work - conflicts and arguments are part of human interaction. Not every insult or argument is bullying. But what distinguishes bullying from other conflicts?

• Someone is ostracized, insulted, ridiculed or threatened. Rumors and untruths are spread or there is physical violence.
• The bullying happens repeatedly over a longer period of time.
• It is a group phenomenon. There are usually a few people who actively bully - the direct perpetrators. They usually come from the victim's personal environment. There are also followers who join the seemingly strong perpetrators. And there are bystanders - people who watch without intervening.
• In contrast to other conflicts, there is an imbalance of power in bullying. The victim is increasingly isolated and forced into a situation in which they can no longer defend themselves alone.

• Anytime, anywhere: In the case of cyberbullying, the perpetrators follow their victims into their bedrooms via smartphone etc.. This makes it even worse for the victims and deprives them of any space to retreat.
• It spreads quickly: once online, a message, a fake profile or a photo can spread like wildfire. The circle of people who know about it becomes huge - and the burden on the victim increases.
• Anonymous and indirect: On the internet, it is easier to hide behind pseudonyms, fake profiles or email addresses. The victim's reaction is also not immediately visible. This leads to a lower inhibition threshold to participate - also known as the "online disinhibition effect".
• is often recognized later: cyberbullying happens 'silently' at first. If photos, videos or rumors are passed on from smartphone to smartphone, parents or teachers may not notice for a long time. Sometimes even the victim only finds out about the content once it has been widely disseminated.
• The abuseescalates more quickly: a nasty insult is often typed faster than it is said. Due to the anonymity and apparent safety, bullying escalates much faster online than offline. Sometimes victims also try to defend themselves with counter-attacks - then the spiral of insults and attacks spirals upwards.
• can catch up with you again and again: the internet forgets nothing. Unfortunately. Even when the acute bullying is over, images and content can often be found online for years and can make life difficult for victims. There is no longer any temporal or spatial safe space.

To prevent cyberbullying in the best possible way, it is important to find out about cyberbullying. For example, about possible warning signs and prevention options. This information should then also be passed on to the children.

A good basis for preventing unpleasant surprises online is self-confidence, the feeling that you can make a difference and a healthy dose of mistrust towards others. Children and young people should be encouraged to form their own opinions and defend them. They should also learn to say "no" and communicate clearly when their boundaries are overstepped.

Even young internet users should understand that the same rules of coexistence apply in virtual life as in everyday life. Anyone who sends messages via apps or is active on social networks needs to know this: There is also a person on the other end with feelings who can be hurt by insults. Children and young people should be encouraged to intervene or inform adults when others are offended online. It should also be discussed that forwarding or liking offensive content is also problematic and can be considered cyberbullying.

Children should not only know their own rights, but also respect the rights of others. This includes the fact that no personal information, images or films may be published without the consent of the persons depicted ("right to one's own image").

Cyberbullying is no joke - on the contrary. Much of what happens is even a criminal offense. Although the term "cyberbullying" itself is not a criminal offense, much of what happens in the context of bullying is. This is because bullying often violates personal rights or attacks people in a way that can also have criminal consequences. Here are some examples of legal violations that can occur in cyberbullying:

• Insult (Section 185 of the Criminal Code)
• Defamation and slander (Sections 186 & 187 of the Criminal Code)
• Threats (Section 241 of the Criminal Code)
• Right to one's own image (§§ 22 & 23 Art Copyright Act)
• Violation of the highly personal sphere of life through image recordings (Section 201a of the Criminal Code)

When parents discover that their child is actively involved in bullying or cyberbullying, many are initially shocked. But it is precisely then that action should be taken as quickly and clearly as possible, but with a cool head.

The following tips can also help parents and teachers:

• Talk to your child as openly as possible to find out their point of view and possible motives: Why did they bully online? Have they been a victim of bullying themselves? Are they under pressure from the clique?
• Make it clear to your child what they are doing with their behavior. It helps to imagine how you yourself would react to such actions (change of perspective).
• In some cases, perpetrators of cyberbullying initially assume that they didn't mean it or that it was just a joke. It can help to talk about the peculiarities of digital communication and explain that there is always a person with real feelings on the other end.
• Clearly ask your child to stop the cyberbullying immediately. In a second step, you should consider together how the situation that has arisen can be ended and resolved without losing face: Who should you apologize to and in what form? Which posts can be deleted, which pictures can be withdrawn? How can you talk to teachers?